I've come into some easy money. The question:
Do I use the money to get settled in an apartment somewhere?
- or -
Do I buy something incredibly stupid?
If I invest in an apartment I'll have: a place to live, an incredibly satisfying distance between myself and my family, the illusion of being an adult, a place to bring "the ladies", a physical manifestation of the enveloping coffin that is existence, and a place to put my books.
If I buy something incredibly stupid I could have: a vespa, a high definition video camera, a bunch of crazy computer software what to pretend I'm a Hollywood movie film editor, a segue, rollerblades, video-games, booze, a weekend in Vermont, surf lessons, a bathtub full of spaghetti, lots and lots of pornography, guitars, bass guitars, a nice suit, candy, real sex doll, hundreds of blankets, root beer floats, plastic surgery, or stocks... like in the stock market.
As I wrote the latter list I realized I have no interest in owning anything right now. Partially this might be because I own a lot of shit. Can I buy away an existential crisis? Without resorting to powerful prescription medication?
On a lighter note, the Hulk comes out soon. That's going to be pretty great. I hear they cut out a scene where Hulk tries to kill himself and somehow meets Captain America in the process; I believe the scene was deemed too interesting for the masses. So no Captain America. That blows. But still Ed Norton... so kick ass.
I'm going to bake myself a cake. Funnel cake. If I could make a funnel cake I'm pretty sure I'd follow a carnival around and offer superior funnel cake from my booth a hundred or so feet from the carnival proper. The secret will be that I'm in league with the carnies, having struck a deal with the carnival manager, Dwayne "eight toes" McAllister, what for the right to operate my cakery without threat of carnival style vengeance, provided I teach them all to read and pass their GED's. I will also be growing a mustache and getting daily hepatitis vaccinations.
